I’m a father of two children, and this is my funny confession:

Jenny, my dad’s favorite, is 7 years old and went to primary school. John will soon be 4 and is very fussy. My wife takes care of them, so leisurely and skillful (although, there are days when she says she regretted becoming a mother).

And when that happens, quickly calm down, wipes her tears and kisses Jenny and John on the forehead (and she wants to kiss me as well but only on the cheek).

I always wondered why women all day long wail: “Look at your room. Why did not you eat beans? Learn Jenny, gain work habits. I’ll go crazy! All day long I am just removing your things (yes, she always put me in the same basket with the children), my back hurts, my legs, my stomach … I’m tired, I’m sleepy… ”

As if it’s some wisdom! As you need a high school that would be a skillful and clever mother, wife, housewife?

If I had not experienced it, I would not believe! A few weeks ago my wife had to go somewhere for two days. Grandmother service in this case was busy. Therefore, I took two days off and dedicated to take care of my children. My little angels!

Morning … Jenny wakes me up at 5 am. Says, John shit to bed. I say, why he did not wake me up to take him to the bathroom.

“He did Dad, but you could not get up. He shouted something, mmm, let me … And then I woke up, but it was too late.” said Jenny while rubbing sleepy eyes.

“Well, here I go to take clean underwear and pajamas while lying down. There’s still time to school.”

“But change the bedding too, it really stinks” again she said.

“Come into the living, tomorrow I’ll change. I shut the door to the room that the odor do not feel. John God, what do you eat? This really stinks.”

Breakfast – agony. I know that John is allergic to peanuts and that’s it. More information I wanted. I could not imagine that an ordinary breakfast can be complicated so much. John wants hot dogs, fried crisp, and she would muesli. It took me a long time to find standing box with it something that I’d never tasted, and my children love it. Jenny went to school, I washed the dishes, changed the bedding, ordered lunch from a nearby restaurant. And again I felt mild fatigue.

Jenny came back from school and needed help her homework in mathematics.

“Jenny wait for your mom, she is good in math. You cannot possibly get an ace, in the first descriptive mark. Is that right?”

John wanted to go to the park. He says he is bored at home. I cannot move, I lay down on the little sofa, my eyelids were heavy…And he was shouting “Daddy, Daddy … let’s go to the park.”

I give him Jenny’s paper and markers to draw. I ask him to be quiet and told Jenny to keep an eye on him while I am a little “winks”. After a while, their waked me laughing. They told me to go to the mirror. What I have seen, John used my face as a coloring book. I laugh with them…

Will I survive this?

Soon dinner. I took some meatballs from the freezer as my wife left.

It was bathing time. They do not have to do it every night, I thought to myself – it is not good for their skin. I already washed John this morning (after a major necessary he performed in bed), Jenny can wash the teeth and we can go to the bed.

But, they wanted a fairy tale. Come on, I began with Cinderella. But, Jenny said they do not like that story. They wanted to tell him that for the brave tailor. To whom? You are joking.

So I gave them the iPad so let find what interests them, the Internet is full of such nonsense at least. Somehow the morning came…It was waking up, but I survived. Tomorrow I expect the same thing…

I couldn’t wait for the day when I’ll see her at the door-the love of my life, my wife, wife, my queen.

I never loved her more than now, when she finally come back. As soon as she saw me, she burst out laughing and after that she kissed me.

“You smell like garbage in the sun,” she said. “The house, like an atomic bomb explode here … You have some remnants of the markers on your face …”

I realized – it is not easy! I Defeated! I was a mother for about 36 hours and failed. Yet I will do what I do best. I admit, is not easy and you have no idea how to succeed. I’ll be there to help, whenever it is needed.

Do you now realized how it is to me? She said.

Yes my love, I do. Now come in the bed with the bedding that I CHANGED.

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